Some days I'm not even ON the roller-coaster of life- some days, I've fallen OFF.
Yep. Right around the loop-de-loop, upside down, and straight off the ride.
Things aren't fun or enjoyable or even extremely bearable anymore. The adrenaline, the rush, the happiness, the smile, the carefree-ness? Going, going, gone.
And after I hit the ground I blink for a moment. I'm stunned. What just happened? But I was having such a good time on there!
... Right?
Doesn't matter. It was better than this.
... Right?
And then I don't know anything. I may have gotten off one roller-coaster, but another- this time an emotional one- is just leaving the station, with me buckled in (like it or not) for the ride.
Up, down, around, around, straight, up, down, up again. Happy! Sad. Boooored. Angry!! Sad. Tired... Happy!
It's exhausting and confusing and utterly identity-crisis-evoking. Who am I? What's happening? Will I ever be normal, be good again?
And the answer is, I don't know. If you're out there scratching your chin, I've already given up on trying to figure any of this out. I have absolutely NO idea.
So the hope of this post is... there's hope. REALLY there is.
When you feel down, look up! When it feels like you don't have anything under control (or when you really DON'T), remember the One who does and that He's holding you!
Peace, be still- the Lord is near.
-Emily
🍂
